hurry up and wait

On tuesday, I recieved another letter from the USCIS (united states citizenship and immigration services). It was just to inform me that they had recieved my second application for Dan to come here; the first one being the permanent visa, or "green card" and the most recent one is a temporary visa while the permanent one processes ( 2-5 years) This whole visa process has become the ultimate stressor in my life. One typo, or if the pen ink is the wrong color, and they reject your app and you start at square one.

I need my husband here. It's not even a want issue anymore. Of course I want him here. But going to bed alone and waking up alone is painful. Especially when I'm married and people still assume I'm single. Because he's not here. And theres nothing either one of us can do about it, and thats the frustrating part. If there was ANYTHING I could do to make this process speed up, I'd do it in a heartbeat. I'd do it right now. But its scary to think my relationship with him, and our future, is all in the hands of the government.
Thats scary.
So now I hurry up and wait. I should recieve a letter within 5-6 months to let me know if the temporary visa was approved. Then he does an interview and a medical. Then if he passes that, he goes onto the world with the magical stamps that let him come here and STAY.

honestly, if you ask me anytime of day what my mind is on, it will be on Dan. I cant concentrate on work, current events, or drama in other peoples lives. I just dont have energy. I check my phone constantly to see if he messaged me. hows his day going? is he having a good day at work? then I convince him to go to the pub because he deserves a beer. But nothing is like having him here, in the same country code as me.

Sooooo to make a long story short. All of you readers out there who have a significant other within your reach- tell them you love them. give them too many hugs. too many kisses. Because If I had that chance I would do it right now.